Get out now! (10-11-2017)


As you are cleaning your house one day, you find a note. “They are coming for you. Get out now!” [link to post]

I chuckled at the note. I did not recognize the handwriting, but the only two options were the apartment’s previous owners, or a practical joke from my wife. The note was under the refrigerator, obviously not meant as a literal warning for me. I pocketed the note, planning to sneak it into my wife’s laptop bag the next day. I continued cleaning the floor in order to move the refrigerator back into its spot. The bluetooth speaker pumping out my cleaning music stopped playing.


“Man, I charged it all night.” I complained at the silence. I walked into the living room from the kitchen to hit play on the phone again, having to make do with the phone’s own poor speaker. I grabbed the speaker to look it over and realized it was off. On the table under the speaker I saw another scrap of paper.


“You’re in Danger! LEAVE!” the note said. I reached into my pocket for the other note, to compare the handwriting, but my pocket was empty.


Maybe the other pocket?” I thought to myself. I searched my jeans thoroughly, but no sign of the first note could be found. Curiosity made me turn over the second note, and I realized the second warning was scribbled on the back of the first. “Huh.” I said. “Okay, point made.”


A quick mental check made sure everything important was off and I grabbed my keys to go grab a cup of coffee. Any excuse to leave the house would do. I reached the door and found a note taped over the peep hole.


“Too late.” was scribbled on it. As soon as I finished reading it a knock almost startled me out of my pants. I almost literally needed to change my pants, and boxers too. Luckily my clothing remained clean. I took a deep breath and opened the door. I accepted the blocked peep hole as a message to not look through it.


I opened the door to an empty hallway. I stepped out and looked both ways, with no sign of anyone. On the floor in front of me was a small golden box, with a purple envelope placed on top of it. On the front of the envelope was my name printed in golden cursive letters that sparkled as it reflected the hallway lights.


I brought the box and envelope inside and placed them on the table. I opened the envelope with my name on it.


“Dear Sir:
I have been requested by the N.N.A.T.T. (Nigerian National Agency of Time Travel) to contact you for assistance in resolving a matter. The N.N.A.T.T. has recently concluded a large number of contracts for Time Travel in your Era and Area. The contracts have immediately produced monies equaling US$400,000,000 according to your current economy. The N.N.A.T.T. is desirous of Time Travel in other Eras and Areas of the world, however, because of certain Future regulations of the Nigerian Government, it is unable to move these funds to another time period.


Your assistance is requested as a non-Future Nigerian citizen to assist the N.N.A.T.T. and also the future Central Bank of Nigeria, in moving these funds out of Nigeria. If you can stop these regulations from being passed, in exchange for your accommodating services, the N.N.A.T.T would agree to allow you to retain 50% of the amount in your time period….”


“The more things change, the more they stay the same I guess.” I laughed, and shrugged. I did not even bother reading through the rest of the scam. I turned my attention to the golden box. I picked it up, and it felt light. The small box almost felt empty. I shook it and it and nothing sounded. I opened it up and peeked inside. There was another letter in a green envelope, with the words “Thank You.” on the front in gold. I opened the envelope. A golden credit card fell out of the letter while I unfolded it.


“Thank you for agreeing to our terms. The enclosed credit card has been authorized for your time period, with a limit of US$200,000,000. Please enjoy!”


Well, that’s a new twist.” I thought. The rest of the letter detailed the banking information. I went to the laptop and checked my balance. 200 million, wow. “I should probably read the rest of that letter.” I said to myself. I reached for the letter, but a sudden windstorm kicked up in the kitchen.


“Dad!” I heard a female voice. A beautiful girl with long black hair walked out of the kitchen.
“Dad! Why did you open the box?” I stared at her. I did not have a daughter yet, but at this point it did not surprise me when she hugged me. It felt natural. I had not met her yet, but I had no doubt that we hugged like this often.


“I didn’t know. I thought it was just a scam,” I defended myself. This younger version of me was not prepared for the years of experience this woman had wrapping me around her finger. She glared at me with loving eyes of disappointment.


“I tried to warn you, why didn’t you leave?” She huffed at me.


“They’re from the future, they can find me anywhere?” I shrugged. “I didn’t know that at the time, obviously. You could have been more specific about what not to do. But what good would me leaving do?”


“They’re SCAMMERS from the future. They weren’t going to waste any time on you if you weren’t home. There’s always another mark. It’s possible someone else would have agreed to it, but it was you. Now everyone in the future hates my dad, because Time Travel isn’t nearly as regulated as it should have been.”


“But, how are they scammers? I checked the bank, they actually paid out.” My daughter smacked my head.


“Dad, it’s time travel. The economy is going to be ruined tomorrow, literally. The money they gave you is going to be as worthless tomorrow as it is in my time.”


“Oh. Well, I’m rich tonight. Want to take your mom out for a fancy dinner and buy a house?”

“Sure,” my daughter said.

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