Cold Hans

[wp] You hear something making noises beneath your bed. You decide to investigate and find a monster of all things. He tells you he came to seek shelter from the cold. from WritingPrompts

Jerry opened his eyes. The seven year old boy held his breath under the heavy comforter his mom covered him with when she tucked him in. A rustling noise woke him up, but he could not hold his breath long enough to hear it again. He gave up, released his breath, and closed his eyes to try and go back to sleep. After several moments he heard the rustling again; now that he was awake it was clear the sound came from under the bed. He smiled to himself and reached for the flashlight he kept under his pillow. 

“Pleasebeamonster, pleasebeamonster, pleasebeamonster,” he whispered to himself over and over as he turned the flashlight on. He rolled over and off the bed as fast as he could to give the monster as little warning as possible. He landed on the floor with the flashlight pointing under the bed. He saw a pair of pale blue palms blocking the flashlight.

“Watch it, that’s bright!” a male voice said from behind the hands.

“Sorry!” Jerry pointed the light away from the man, but it still illuminated the space beneath the bed. The voice belonged to a bald, blue skinned man hiding under Jerry’s bed. “I have a monster under my bed!” Jerry sounded giddy and he dropped the flashlight to wave at the stranger eagerly with both hands. 

“Don’t get used to it junior, I’m just passing through. The tunnel gets really cold on winter nights and I didn’t plan very well,” the blue man shrugged. “I’ll be gone in the morning. Maybe some other monster will come along and keep you company.” 

“But you’re here for tonight, right? What’s your name?” Jerry asked. The blue man shook his head. 

“Go back to sleep, kid. I’m not looking for a playmate.” After that he lowered his head and rested it on his blue hands as if he was trying to take a nap.

“Oh, okay. Goodnight Mr. Monster,” Jerry said. He stood from the floor, climbed on the bed, and began jumping on it right in the middle. He knew his mom would not hear the noise, she never did. After about a dozen jumps the blue man crawled out from under the bed and stood in Jerry’s room. The tall, lean man’s skin was blue from bald head to barefoot toe. 

“If I play with you for a little bit will you let me go to sleep?” the man asked. 

“My mom says I can’t play with strangers,” Jerry replied with a smirk. The tall blue man sighed. 

“My name is Hans,” he said. Jerry stopped jumping on the bed at last. He walked to the edge and fell on it in a seated position.

“I’m Je-,” Hans interrupted him.

“You’re a sleepy boy that’s going to go to bed after a game,” Hans said. 

“But-,” Jerry’s protest was interrupted again by a heavy rustling noise coming from the closet. Jerry and Hans both looked at the closet, then at each other. 

“Looks like you got yourself a playmate kid. Go check it out,” Hans smiled at Jerry, but Jerry shook his head and retreated to the center of the bed. 

“No way. Closet monsters are dangerous.” 

“You’re not kidding,” Hans chuckled to himself as he huddled on the bed next to Jerry.

“You go check it out!” Jerry said. “You’re already a monster.” 

“Look kid, I’m not a monster. I’m just a guy from a different universe that happens to have blue skin. We use the tunnels to travel between universes, and it just so happens that in this universe all our tunnels open under beds.” Hans said with a shrug.

“And the closet?”

“I dunno, your universe is weird. The closet is another set of tunnels to another universe. That universe definitely has monsters.” 

“So you’re just being a chicken. You’re gonna let a monster eat a seven year old boy?” Jerry asked. Hans shrugged.

“Well, I’m not against it.” The noise came from the closet again. 

“Go check it out, or I’ll move my bed.” Jerry said. He had retreated even further back from the closet, and sat at the far end of the bed while Hans remained in the center. The blue man sighed.

“Fine, but if I die it’s your fault,” he said. Hans stood, paced across the room and entered the closet. Jerry checked the time on his tablet and waited. After 15 minutes he began to get worried. After 30 minutes he started to debate waking his mom, but did not know what to tell her. At 45 minutes Hans strolled out of the closet at the same moment Jerry was reaching for the door.

“Where ya going, junior?” Hans asked. Jerry turned and smiled at the blue man. 

“What happened??” Hans smiled and winked at Jerry.

“Kid, you’re some kinda lucky charm. I’m gonna stick around under your bed, because I got me a date with a hot closet monster named Cardigan. She looks a bit like a demon, got ram horns and the whole works, but she seems nice.” 

“Can we play a game?” Jerry asked, but Hans shook his head. 

“Not tonight, it really is late. But like I said, I’m gonna stick around. We can play tomorrow night, okay?” Jerry nodded and hugged the blue man. 

Hans Wringing

[WP] The monster under your bed finally meets the monster in your closet. [Link to post.]


“What about this?” A tall blue-skinned man posed in front of Jerry. He modeled a pair of blue jeans with a loud yellow and blue polka dot shirt. The young boy sat on the bed and shook his head.


“That shirt’s ugly,” the boy said. “Go back to the black and white one.” The man’s shirt shifted colors. The blue polka dots turned white, and the yellow shirt became black. The boy nodded. “That looks better.”  A gentle knock struck the door. “Hide!” the boy whisper-shouted at the blue man. The tall man dropped to the floor and rolled under the bed seconds before a woman walked into Jerry’s room.


“Hey Champ all set for bed?” the woman asked as she sat down next to Jerry. She pulled the heavy comforter up to tuck him in. Jerry nodded.


“Hans is going on a date tonight, he’s really excited,” the boy said.


“Oh is he?” She asked with false interest. “Did he meet her under your bed too?” Jerry shook his head.


“Nu uh. Last week I heard a noise in the closet,” Jerry pointed to the closed closet door. “…and Hans went to go check for me. It was a girl monster and they became friends.” Jerry’s mother chuckled.


“You sent the monster under your bed to check your closet for monsters?” She patted his head, and Jerry nodded. “That’s very brave of Hans, make sure you thank him for me.”


“Hans is great, I hope he wants to meet you one day. He says parents freak out when they see he’s real.” Jerry shrugged. His mother nodded.


“I know I’d be surprised to meet a tall blue man, and his blue girlfriend,” she said.


“MOOOooom.” Jerry felt a flush of embarrassment for his friend. “She’s not his girlfriend yet, they’re only going on a date. And she’s not blue. Hans said her name is Cardigan, and she has curly horns like a ram.”


“Oh? She sounds fancy, I hope Hans is dressed nicely.” Jerry nodded.


“He looks great.” Jerry’s mother stood from the bed, leaned forward and kissed his forehead, then walked out of the room. She flipped the light switch off on her way out.


“G’night, Jerry. Sweet dreams, champ. I’ll see you in the morning.”


“G’night mom!” Jerry called out as the door closed. “Okay, she’s gone.” Jerry leaned over the side then stuck his hand into the dark gap between the floor and the bottom of his bed. He felt Han’s familiar grip squeeze around his small hand and pulled the man upward out of the darkness.  Instead of the white and black polka dot shirt, he now wore a full dark black tuxedo with a bow tie and everything.


“What happened to your clothes?” Jerry asked. Hans shrugged.


“Your mom was right. I wanted to dress nicer for Cardigan,” the blue man said. Jerry nodded from his bed.


“My mom’s right about a lot of things. You should meet her.” It was Hans’ turn to shake his head.


“Sorry, Jerry. Your mom said it herself. She’d be very ‘surprised’ if she met me. She doesn’t think I’m real, and it might be bad if she finds out I am.”


“So you never get to meet parents?” Jerry asked.


“Nope. Eventually, you’re going to outgrow me, and I’ll have to find some other kid’s bed to live under.” Jerry sternly shook his head.


“No. It won’t happen to me. I’ll remember you and when I have kids you can live under their bed, and I’ll believe them that you exist.” Hans walked to the bed and patted Jerry on the head.


“That’d be nice. But I’ve got too much going on tonight to worry about the future.” Hans bowed his head slightly and saluted Jerry. “Be a good boy and don’t wait up for me. I’m gonna go pick my date up.”


“Have fun!” Jerry waved at the man as he disappeared into the closet.

Monsters (10-9-2017)

After a young child is kidnapped, the monster under their bed and the monster in their closet decide to team up to bring them home. [link to post]
The woman ran into Malcolm’s room yelling for help while her husband dealt with the kidnappers on the phone.
“Hans, Cardigan. Help! Malcolm’s been kidnapped!”
A blue, otherwise normal, hand reached out from under the bed. Another hand followed it. The creature pulled himself out of the shadows and revealed himself to be a blue man. He stood taller than the woman. Long purple bangs covered his eyes, and he wore a red t-shirt with black jeans. Then a tall, furry woman walked out of the closet. Her eyes were crystal clear, almost invisible. The fur on her face, arms, and legs consisted of very fine blonde baby fur. A pair of ram horns grew on either side of her blond pony tail, they curled in on themselves.
“What do you know so far?” Hans, the blue man asked. His voice sounded like a whisper at a funeral. The woman looked at her phone to check the messages from her husband.
“They want 10 million dollars. They said they would call back in two hours with directions.”
“Found him,” Cardigan said. Her eyes were closed and her horns glowed with golden light. “They have a bed and a closet. Hans, go get our boy. When you’re clear I’m going to make sure they learn not to mess with my son.” Cardigan touched Hans on the head and his eyes glowed gold behind his purple bangs. Hans got down on the floor and crawled under the bed.
“I know I don’t say it enough, Cee, but thank you. Both you and Jerry, thank you for taking such great care of our son. He’s only 10. Younger than I would have liked to tell him everything, but I think he will have questions after tonight. When Hans gets back, please talk to him with your husband. I’ll join you as soon as I deal with the kidnappers.” Cardigan walked into the closet and disappeared. The instant she disappeared Cee heard Malcolm’s screams coming from under the bed.
“AAAHHHHHH! STAY AWAY MONSTER!” Malcolm appeared under his bed and scurried out into his room. He looked panicked until he realized where he was.
“Mom? MOM! RUN! THERE’S A MONSTER!” The small blonde boy grabbed the woman’s hand and tried to pull her out of the room. She did not move.
“That monster rescued you from the kidnappers. You should probably thank him at least,” Cee said. She yanked hard and Malcolm was pulled back into the room. He saw a pair of blue hands appear from under the bed and Hans stood up. He smiled at Malcolm.
“Hello, Malcolm. It’s nice to meet you,” Hans whispered. He bowed slightly at the waist. “My name is Hans.” Malcolm did not move. He stood behind his mother and eyed the tall blue man.
“Don’t worry dear. Hans is a friend, I’ve known him longer than I’ve known you,” Cee said. She pulled Malcolm forward in front of her.
“Mom? You know monsters?” Malcolm asked. He looked up to the woman while he held her hand.
“I know a few, but we need to have a conversation. Let’s go to the living room.” She walked out of Malcolm’s bedroom while still holding the boy’s hand. Hans followed behind them.
“Dad!” Malcolm yelled. He ran towards the big man and gave him a big hug.
“Hey champ. I’m glad you’re okay. Were you scared?” The man asked while embracing the boy. Malcolm shook his head.
“Mom knows a blue man?”
“Yep. I know him too, he’s a great guy.”
“How did you guys meet a blue guy?” Malcolm asked the room.
“More important than that, I think we have to discuss who the blue guy is,” Cee said. She sat down on the couch next to Malcolm and gestured that Hans should sit near them too.
“Malcolm, this is going to be a lot to take in. But you need to know that we all love you very much, and only want what’s best for you. Nothing has changed and we will answer any questions you have. You are adopted. You’re not my biological son. Hans is your real father. And you’ll meet your real mother soon too.”
“What? What do you mean? You’re my mom!” Malcolm hugged Cee tight.
“Hans and his wife, your real mother, are our best friends. I grew up with your mother, her name is Cardigan, living in my closet. Hans grew up under Jerry’s bed. Cardigan and Hans actually introduced Jerry and I to each other. They were a couple for a long time, and then you were born. You looked too human to grow up in either of their worlds, so we all agreed to raise you together. We were going to tell you all this when you were older, but the kidnapping kind of brought them to light.” Cee explained.
“I’m sorry mom. The kidnapping was a joke. My friends said it would be funny to pretend, and then to see your faces when I’m safe and sound.”
“What?” Hans asked.
“It was just pretend. I was going to come home in a couple of hours, before the kidnappers called back.”
“Hey guys, where are we in the conversation?” Cardigan walked into the room, her cloven hooves sounded like high heels on the hardwood floor. Her wet fur smelled a bit like wet goat, and Hans noticed she missed some blood on her horns when she cleaned herself up to meet her son.